Busy Little Beavers

The man thing and I are going to be busy busy busy today. We have a little catering job so A) The man thing can earn some work experience which will be awesome for his course and B) to earn a little something to go towards looming bills!!

I kind of got dragged into it (not unwillingly I must add) because the other person who was scheduled to do the work with my man thing ended up incommunicado so I was volunteered. Yippee!
Something to keep me busy. Something productive to do, even if it is mostly just washing dishes lol.

The SIL is coming around today as well and will be staying a few days until we take her down the line to FILs.

We have a TON of housework to catch up on *Blush* but that will just have to wait until most probably tomorrow when I drag myself out of bed.

Busy busy busy!!

Oh the Excitement

Seems that I'm destined to have an exciting pregnancy. Over the weekend I was back up the hospital again for pains and finding MORE of the stitch work, and I had a couple of symptoms of a urinary tract infection so I wanted to get it checked out.
Turned out that I DON'T have a urinary tract infection, the ache in my back is most likely just from bubs pressing on one of the ribs round the front and where the pain is round the back is where the stress is being transferred to so it's aching.

Good news about the stitch work though is there's more than one loop of it holding my cervix closed so what's fallen out so far isn't panic-worthy. Sure, it's a little concerning that it's falling out at all but at this point there's nothing they can do about it.

This morning I got to visit the lovely Dildo-cam again and had my cervical length checked. At the scan 3 weeks ago it was 27mm long but today it's only 20mm long. That's still a pretty decent length of cervix but the concern is in the fact that it is still shortening. Bubs is persistently breech at the moment and seems in no hurry to move. So anyway the OB and I had a little bit of a chat and everything and we made some decisions about what to do. I'm having steroid injections to help mature baby's lungs faster just in case he does decide to make his grand entrance in the near future, I have to go back to the hospital to get jabbed in the bum again tomorrow lol. The injection stings!!
And also I'm going to pack an emergency bag that we can just pick up and run out the door with so I don't have to be fluffing around with finding clothes and so the man thing doesn't have to worry about trying to find me something that I will actually wear. Knowing him he'll just grab a handful of shirts and a pair of pants and none of it will fit me lol. Either that or it will all be too heavy for the weather at the moment and I'll end up overheating. Best to make sure it's all packed by me, the right way *Wink*


I hope everyone else had a good Christmas and it was a lot less drama filled than mine.

Merry Christmas

Hope everyone has been having a great christmas.

Christmas and Birthdays

Well we don't really do Christmas as such, it's more just a family feast with the odd gift occasionally thrown in. This year my nana is giving us a meat pack (yum yum) and she's also giving the man thing a weed eater (line trimmer) so he can cut our lawn (or the pitiful excuse we have for one anyway lol)

I'll tell all about the food tomorrow but suffice to say YUM!

The man thing has some jewellery to give me (I helped him pick it out so I KNOW I'm going to like it lol) and I was hoping that my mum would have enough money to get me a hair dryer (I've taken over her bank accounts at her request and I know exactly how much money she doesn't have) but that can wait until my birthday.
18 days until my birthday and I'll be entering my second decade. Goodie goodie.

I found my first 3 stretchmarks today. They're not massive but they're definitely there. To be completely honest, I don't give a rats ass about them lol. I knew it was highly likely to happen seeing as I'm pretty prone to stretchmarks and I think the OI has a bit to do with that. The lack of collagen I'd say.

Fingers crossed my stretchmarks don't make it to the tattoo that I have on my right side. I'd hate to see that ruined.

Heat: Part 2

So I now know why it was so freaking hot today. The temperature got up to 45 degrees (113f)
Talk about OUCH!!
The only way I managed to cope was iceblocks and sitting in my paddling pool up to my chest in lovely cold water.
It's cooling down a lot now, as in it's in the 20s rather than the 30s or 40s (I pant thinking about it!) but this is definately going to be one hell of a hot summer. I break out in a sweat just thinking about it!

Heat

It is so gosh damn hot. I feel like I'm going to melt into a puddle of sticky clothes. Wearing as little as possible and it's still too much. I'm about to jump in my freezing cold paddling pool to cool off for a while. Mmmm... coldness.

Shopping Galore

So today, for the first time in a looooong time, the man thing and I went on a bit of a shopping spree. I now have some more summer clothes that I'm not going to melt in!! I have singlets and dresses!! Now all I need is a couple of sarongs to wear as skirts and I'm all set.

Hip hip, hooray

I've made another one of my goals. Technically.
I'm now 26 weeks by the clock lol. 43 minutes into 26 weeks.
I'm very happy with this. Every extra week is another week towards term and the best chances for my little sproglet.

Now, if only I could figure out how to reduce nipple leakage down to acceptable levels lol. Dribbling every few hours is NOT nice.

Cuteness!

Walking towards the kitchen this evening I hear crunch crunch crunch and think "oh yeah, the cats having some bikkies"
Well when I looked it wasn't the cat lol. It was a hedgehog!! A cute little hedgehog had let itself inside via our ranch slider (which is jammed open a little bit for the cat to get in and out but so no-one can push it open further) and decided to have a munch on some cat bikkies. It was absolutely gorgeous! Only a little juvenile one too.
So I saw the little black shape, turned the light on expecting to see a rat or something and the hedgehog scuttled through the cats water bowl (lol) and into the pantry. I couldn't help it, I had to wake the man thing up to tell him!
The man thing and I found something to pick it up with (those prickles are rather sharp!) and took it out the front and put it on the porch. It toddled over to the edge and walked up and down trying to figure out how to make it down the 10cm or so to the driveway. It then slid carefully over the edge and toddled over the driveway and into the darkness.

All I can say now about it is NAAWWWWW!!! It was just so damn cute!!

Mutter mutter

That bloody cat decided that her dinner time would be moved to 6:30am. Yeah. Right! She also decided that since I was still asleep at that time then she would wake me up... by howling in my face!!!
Did she get any food?  Nope. I showed her her bikkies and then went back to bed.

Bloody cat!!

Umm THAT's not meant to happen, is it?

Well what else am I supposed to think when I find NYLON in my Hoohaa? Logical explanation is it's part of my suturing, right? UH OH!!
Yeah, here's the thing, OB (not mine, the one on call) says "Well there's nothing I can do about it. We will have to wait and see" *Headdesk*  Gee, thanks doc!

And that was only after the FIRST piece. I haven't reported the second yet *Blush* 

Well I know for sure it's some of the suturing material because I now don't have nylon radiating from my cervix. Bedroom activities are much more comfortable for the man thing lol. I know for a fact my cervix is still nice and closed, just how it should be. Now it better bloody well stay that way!!

Just one more thing to be paranoid about I guess *sigh*

*Sigh*

The antenatal classes are done! Now what am I going to do with my Wednesday nights?  Lol.

We had a good evening. Had a couple of people come talk to us like a dental health nurse and someone from playcentre. We were also supposed to have a Plunket nurse come talk to us but she couldn't make it.
Then we had nibbles!! I made curried egg sammies after a lot of worry about whether or not they were suitable. They went down a treat. Everyone dug in and I didn't have any to bring home. Luckily I have more curried egg in the fridge so I can have some more for munchies later *wink*

The man thing then had to leave so he didn't get to watch the baby being bathed. He has work tonight.
The baby being bathed was so cool!! Just seeing it happen right in front of us was definitely more informative than watching a dvd or reading it in a book.

So yeah, the man thing is working tonight. He's doing some behind the bar work at one of the pubs and pool halls just down the road from us. It's great. If he does a certain amount of behind the bar work then he can go for his bar managers license (after some other prep work for it that is) and then he will be pretty employable. The bars and pubs around here would much rather hire someone with their bar managers license than hire a rookie.

So yeah. My Wednesday nights are free again and I get the bed to myself for most of tonight. Here's hoping it cools off a little!!

Paranoia. Again.

So I've just got home from another trip up to the hospital to get things checked out in my downstairs department because things seemed a little... wrong.
This time it's because I've been feeling these random sharp stabby type pains in my cervix. If you google it (I did) it's not the most reassuring picture, but I'm glad I can read stuff like that and keep a level head.
I rang my mum and talked things over with her and she recommended that I give the delivery suite at the hospital a call and see what they say, so I did. I explained everything and was told it would probably be a good idea to go in there to get it all checked out.

Well now, what an interesting experience that was! I had my temperature and blood pressure taken and my temp was a little high, blood pressure was normal.
So then it came to checking on bubs to make sure he was ok. Turns out he's turned transverse sometime in the last couple of weeks so it was a little trickier to find his heartbeat than it usually is. Then he decided to play hide and seek with the CTG so we couldn't get a reading of his heart rate with that so the midwife brought in the handheld Doppler which bubs decided to play hide and seek with too!! We eventually pinned him down (I don't think he liked being woken up by the prodding hands lol) and got a reading on his heart rate and it was perfectly fine.

Then came the waiting for the doc to come check me. My OB poked her head in and said hi. She'd just come from theatre so she let one of her colleagues check on me. The doc had a look at my cervix and said it looked closed, and she took a swab to check for any infections that may be brewing and possibly causing the slight rise in temperature.

So while all this is going on I'm chatting away with one of the midwives about a book lol, the one by Jodi Picoult about a girl with Osteogenesis Imperfecta, Handle with Care. I haven't read it but this midwife had and she was telling me about it. It does sound like an interesting book, I've just never been all that interested in getting it out of the library. Maybe now I will.

So anyway, the doc says she cant see anything physically wrong that may cause the stabbing pains I've been experiencing so they take my temperature again to see if I need overnight observation and my temp has come down to normal levels so I'm deemed fit to go home but if I have any concerns or if the pains get worse then I'm quite welcome to go back to get checked out again.

I think that the slight elevation in temperature was because about half an hour before going into the hospital I had a warm shower which could have raised my temp just that little bit.

So yeah, I'm home now and still experiencing the odd stabby pain still. I'm going to take a paracetamol and head to bed, try to get some sleep. The man thing is out trialling at a bar to see if he can get a job there so I've got the bed to myself until he manages to come home lol.

Birth Plans

Something that I keep seeing in my cyber travels around all sorts of different birth/baby blogs and even in some books is talk of Birth Plans. What is a birth plan?

Now understand I can only describe a birth plan from my point of view but I will describe some of the purported Birth Plans that apparently cause medical staff to laugh in peoples faces.

My kind of birth plan is pretty specific in that I dont beat around the bush and make it flowery, but it's not all demanding either. I like to think that my birth plan is pretty fair.
It states things in terms of "I would prefer..." rather than "This is the way it's going down, bitches!!"

I understand that emergencies happen which is why my birth plan covers many contingencies, even the possibility that I could have a cesarean. It doesn't say anything like "A cesarean is the LAST thing that I want" it simply says that if a cesarean is required I wish for the man thing to have skin to skin as soon as possible, if he so wishes.

Nothing too confrontational about that now is there?

Stuff like this *Click Me* is rather counter-intuitive. See, a birth plan isn't actually a PLAN, or at least it shouldn't be because of course birth cant actually be PLANNED. Things can be considered though and those things can be PLANNED for.

A birth plan shouldn't read "I want to turn up at the hospital, be checked and found to be 7cm dilated, I want to have an Epidural placed 10 minutes later that works perfectly and then 3 hours later I want to be checked again, found to be 10cm dilated and then directed how to push. Pushing will take no more than 1 hour and my baby will slip out with no problems, perfect APGARs and then latch immediately. I will have no tears or need for an episiotomy."

That is the kind of birth plan that is definately going to make a health care providers hackles rise. Hell, just writing it is making MY hackles rise!

A birth plan which I think would be better recieved by the health care professionals (be they a midwife, nurse, OB) would be one along the lines of;

I would prefer Intermittent monitoring over continuous monitoring.
I CANNOT have an Epidural so please do not offer this to me. 
I wish to have Entonox avaliable at my request.
I wish to have a birthing tub avaliable for my use if I so desire during labour.
I would prefer to avoid an episiotomy and would rather tear naturally.
I would prefer that the cord not be clamped or cut until it ceases pulsating.
I would prefer a physiologic third stage of labour.

Now some people may think that that sounds a little too pleading but it plainly states how I feel about all of the above. Now, barring an emergency I cant see why any of those "requests" would be ignored. Of course, here in New Zealand the environment and all the attitudes seem to be vastly different to those in the USA where most of the Birth Plan issues seem to stem from.

I have already talked over many of these things with either my midwife or the antenatal classes that I have been attending. I have a little checklist in my notes that states my preferences to things like monitoring and cord clamping/third stage. Still, I wont know what is really going to happen until I'm actually in the process of labouring/birthing so we will have to wait and see how it all turns out.

Uh Oh

Reading THIS post by The Feminist Breeder, a blog that I follow, makes me wonder what I've let myself in for with writing my blog. I always thought it would be cool to have a place to speak out about what's happening with me and so on but maybe I've bitten off more than I can chew...

So far I have 5 followers and 1, maybe 2 occasional commenters, but who knows how many people actually read. I'm really glad I havent been flamed or had anyone bitching about what I've written. REALLY glad lol.


Maybe I should just be thankful that I have such a small following. It doesn't get all angsty on me.

My stance

Ok, I cant quite find the balls to call myself a Natural Childbirth Advocate/Activist so I'll stick with Supporter. You want to know why? Check out this website *Click me* and some of the bullshit that comes out of the mouths of medical professionals who are supposed to keep us safe and supported during pregnancy, childbirth and the times soon after.

THIS is why I support the Natural Childbirth movement.

Brain Disconnect

I keep finding it really hard to get down what I'm meaning to write about Natural Childbirth. I keep getting off track. Reading back over my previous post I realised that I don't say much of how I actually feel about natural childbirth, merely that I'm really eager to avoid cesareans.

I'm going to have to give it a try another time. Tonight I'm just too tired.

Rhyme and Reason

The other day I touched on the fact that I am a Natural Childbirth supporter. I thought I would expand on why.

As I said, I was reading up on everything about pregnancy and birth that I could get my hands on. I wanted to know what to look forward to. Drugs and medications never really sounded that appealing to me, though the Entonox always did. In one of the pregnancy and childbirth books I found a list of all the painkilling medications that are commonly given during labour and birth and it included a list of side effects for both mother and child. I lapped it up! I now wish I knew what book that it was in so I could read the list over again. The best of the bunch sounded like the Entonox. Only downside to it is it doesn't work for everyone and some people feel really spaced out while using it.
Well, I know for a fact that it works for me! And very well too. 3 puffs and I'm not feeling any pain at all. Any more than that though and I feel nauseous.

So, while I'm all for the Entonox, WHY else am I natural childbirth supporter? Well, pretty much I have no choice. See, either I go as naturally as possible or I can do it like in the "good" old days and get knocked out and sliced open. See, due to some surgery on my spine to fix my scoliosis, it's now impossible for me to have an Epidural or Spinal block. Thus if I have a cesarean, it's lights out for me. Sound appealing to me? HELL NO!

Also, reading all the natural childbirth books that I could get my hands on, and later all the websites and blogs that I could find, I found out that doing it the medical way isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Now, in saying that things like cesareans and other obstetric procedures have a very good and very important place. It's when they're OVERused that I have an objection to them.

I myself was born via cesarean. I was a stubborn breech and with the 50/50 chance of OI no-one wanted to take the risk that I would break something on the way out. As it was I was born with a broken femur (thigh bone) but it healed quickly after birth. My mum has no bad words to share about her experience. It wasn't easy for her to establish breastfeeding due to a dodgy latch (I would get the nipple under my tongue every single time) but she was determined! After 12 days in the hospital she had it down pat and she breastfed me for 13 months. The only reason she stopped when she did was because I bit her and almost detached her nipple. Oops...

Whoopsie, kind of went a little off track there.

So, I have a very good reason for wanting to avoid a cesarean seeing as I want to be "Present" for the birth of my child/ren and if I'm knocked out then the man thing wouldn't have the opportunity to be present either! That's not an acceptable situation for me so I've looked at the alternatives.

Ultimately, if I wasn't classed as high risk for any reason then my dream birth would be at home. Because I'm high risk that simply isn't possible because I doubt I could find a midwife who would support me and going unassisted really isn't my cup of tea.

Now of course if there is some sort of emergency where having a cesarean would save my life or the babies life then I'm all for it, I'm just not going to be signing up for an elective cesarean anytime soon.

Family Drama, again

I thought that pregnant women were supposed to have a reputation for being emotionally unstable and prone to flying off the handle for no (seemingly) good reason. Seems like I'm the most level headed one in my family at the moment. Not that that's really anything very new...

Last night there was SO much drama going on. Family members yelling at each other, hanging up on each other and lots of tears.

And of course my mother (one of the main causes of the big blowout last night) was doing her usual "Poor me, I've been yelled at and now I'm all unstable and... GIVE ME ATTENTION"
Yeah, no sympathy from me.

Yummy yummy

My hips and thighs wont me liking me but bubs and my bones certainly will. The darling man thing and I decided to buy a whole bottle of milk to dedicate to milkshakes for this week. We have banana and strawberry flavoured syrups and we got a tub of icecream too to make them really nice. Made one jug full and the man and I drank it all so fast. Was just SO good.

Thumbs up to calcium *wink*

Appointments

Well I'm still in one piece. Saw the obstetrician today and had a scan done (internal, first one ever, have many more to look forward to) which shows my cervix is still funnelling but my cervix is 27mm long so that's a pretty decent length. OB said everything else looks good, measurements and fetal heart beat are all normal. Now it really is just a case of wait and see.

I have another appointment in 3 weeks time (just after Christmas) where I'll be getting another internal scan (oh goodie...) just to check up on things. There was some talk of steroids after the next appointment as a precaution but we will have to wait and see about that. Fingers crossed I make it to the next appointment with no issues at all.

During the scan I confirmed that what I keep feeling poking and prodding my cervix is definitely a hand. Little bugger had his hand riiight in there lol having a good grope around. No wonder I feel uncomfortable at times.

Oh. My. Goodness.

I actually think I'm going to make it to 24 weeks. Granted, I have 1 hour to go lol but I'm pretty damn confident that things wont go tits up in just an hour (Touch wood!)

I'm still feeling nervous about some cervix twinges that I've been having. Some of them are baby induced, as in bubs decides to give me a good punch or prod. Not nice. Some are just little twangs that I cant identify a reason for. Here's hoping that things are shown to be fine at the scan on Tuesday. Funnelling I can handle, so long as the cerclage is doing its job, which it seems to be so far.

I'm really hoping that I can hold out until 32 weeks at the earliest so I can give birth at my local hospital. It's seriously a stones throw from my house lol. I can see it from my front door!! If I happen to go earlier than that I'll have to be taken via helicopter to the big children's hospital about 2 hours away (by car) because they have all the special facilities for a prem that early.

*Sigh*

I'll wake up in the morning and be 24 weeks pregnant. Feels like such a remarkable achievement for me.

Letting go

My partner suggested that we take Antonys ashes to the beach and bury them. I realised that I'm just not ready to let him go when my eyes welled with tears and I couldn't say anything for fear of sobbing. I dont know if or when I will ever be ready.

Damnitt, now my eyes are leaking again.

Coming out

So I don't even know why I decided to avoid this on my own blog *shrug* but I'm going to come out and say it.

I'm a natural childbirth supporter.

Yeah, I bet that's a bit of an anticlimax LOL.
So what's the big deal about me being a natural childbirth supporter anyway? Well first off in all my travels around cyberspace in search of information about childbirth I kept finding things about "natural" childbirth. I read all sorts of books during my first pregnancy, up to and including Pregnancy for Dummies. Yes, there is a book called Pregnancy for Dummies.
I SCOURED my local library, picking up every book about pregnancy and childbirth I could find. I read them all. I soaked up all the new information and all the new opinions like a sponge. Some of the opinions and information I mentally put question marks beside but still, I read it all. I already had a few opinions myself on childbirth and whatnot but nothing solid.

Then I found the eye opening book "Pushed" by Jennifer Block. After reading that I just couldn't look at childbirth the same. I was horrified by the atrocities I was reading about that seemed to be the "norm" in American childbirth. Sure, I had read about a majority of them in all the other books but those books didn't paint anywhere near the same picture as "Pushed" did.

My eyes were opened. I couldn't look at routine interventions in childbirth the same again. Thus, I went looking into the alternatives to the "hospital norm" that I kept reading about (bear in mind that a lot of the books I was reading were written in the USA and more geared towards the maternity system in that country, the maternity system in New Zealand is completely different, it's like comparing apples and pumpkins). I read about a woman in "Pushed", Ina May Gaskin, who was hailed as the mother of American Midwifery and went looking for the book she had written called "Spiritual Midwifery". A spark was flaring into a blaze, I had to find out more about Natural childbirth! I read the book and though some of the concepts in it sounded a bit out there even for my extremely open mind, I took it all in. It clicked with me. It just sounded so RIGHT to me.

Thus began my foray into Natural childbirth. I haven't stopped reading about it since. Luckily here in New Zealand we have a much more midwifery model of care rather than the American Obstetric model. Obstetricians are required, just like any other branch of medicine is required, the USA has just pushed that to the extreme.

I for one am very glad we have Obstetricians and I am seeing one myself, simply because my pregnancy is classed as high risk first due to my Osteogenesis Imperfecta and second because of my incompetent cervix (which could possibly be linked in to the OI) so I'm glad that I have the professional backup there if and when I need it. That being said, at my prenatal appointments and everything I see a midwife (all of my prenatal care is through the hospital) which I certainly think is better than seeing the OB at every appointment. My OB is a busy woman who certainly has better things to be doing than seeing me for the basic antenatal appointments where I pee on a stick and have my blood pressure taken.

I'm currently seeing my OB fortnightly (due to my dodgy cervix lol) and I'm glad that I have her on board. Would I much rather that I didn't need to see her at all? Definitely. She's lovely and all and I like her but she's proof that I'm screwed up and sometimes I could do without the reminder *wink*.

Ok so this ended up going on a bit of a tangent, oops, lol.

I'm a natural childbirth supporter because I agree with other natural childbirth supporters that birth has been medicalised to the point where more women and children are harmed than lives are saved. Whether it be physical or mental trauma. I'm a natural childbirth supporter because I believe that women (and their families) should have options available for their care. A one size fits all birthing policy can be detrimental to the health of either mother, child or both.
I, like many of the other natural childbirth supporters that I have come across in my cyber-travels, thoroughly dislike (and some even hate) the phrase "All that matters is a healthy baby" because there is much more at stake than just a healthy baby.

Counting Down

I now have 3 days until my baby is considered viable. A mere 3 days. The thought actually frightens me somewhat. I'm not entirely sure why, this baby is most certainly wanted, but still I'm nervous. Possibly the whole fear of the unknown thing.

Counting down the days and making small goals are a couple of the ways that I've been finding helpful while I try to cope with such a stressful time. Not overtly stressful, but the worry is still there, niggling in the back of my mind. I feel paranoid about every little niggle, ache, twitch and twinge. I worry if baby hasn't moved much in a day, or if I have a lot of Braxton Hicks contractions. I'm a compulsive knicker-checker. I cant help it, every time I go to the loo I check.
I worry about how the movements feel, especially if they're low movements. I could swear that I've felt this little ninja attack my cervix a few times. Rather disconcerting when I'm super paranoid about any feelings/pain/discomfort in that area, a sudden fist to the cervix can make me jump lol.

Once I make it to 24 weeks (3 more days, only 3) then my next short term goal is going to be 26 weeks. Long term goal is going to be 32 weeks so I can deliver at my local hospital (a hop skip and a jump down the road) rather than needing to be airlifted to the national childrens hospital 2 hours away (by car)
9 weeks to that goal.
I'm pretty sure I can make it but I have to be realistic with my expectations. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst and all that jazz.

Breast vs. Formula

So I think the whole breastfeeding vs. Formula feeding debate is absolutely ridiculous but something that I see in my cyber-travels is how the possible benefits of breastfeeding have been over hyped and oversold. I found this article written by a woman, a retired OB/GYN who I love to cyber-stalk (lol) and while I quite often disagree with her views, she has made me think about things from a different perspective even though she patently refuses to see any perspective but her own.

What I enjoy the most about this article however, are the comments. The actual conversation about the article that the Doctor presented. One of the comments that I found extremely apt;

"Breastfeeding is the biological norm for humans. Why should breastfeeding have to prove its self as being healthier/better?"

I have to say, to me this has hit the nail right on the head.

Why SHOULD breastfeeding have to prove itself better than formula?

Another quote from the same commenter;

"We do not need to over sell the benefits of breastfeeding at all. Breastfeeding is normal for our species however we are doing mothers a disservice by letting them believe that artificial feeding is safe (there are NO studies to show formula is safe), that there are no health risks associated. Why do we have no qualms about telling mothers that drinking alcohol in pregnancy can cause birth defects and damage their babies but we cannot tell these same mothers that formula feeding has health risks for fear of “making them feel guilty”?????"

Now this isn't me trying to attack any formula feeding parents out there who happen to read this blog, this is merely me agreeing with this commenter asking why should breastfeeding have to prove itself BETTER than formula.

As a friend of mine has said, you cant tell who was breastfed or formula fed just by looking at a child/teen/adult. In the long term it is not obvious.

One thing that puzzles me about the whole debate, more from an American perspective than anything else, is how formula seems to be the standard and how breastfeeding has to prove itself "better". This is why I like the commentary of this article, there is true discussion about it and it's from a scientifically based standpoint.

Setting the bar at formula, in my eyes, is silly. Formula hasn't been around for anywhere near as long as breast milk, it's (generally) based on cows milk, something designed to feed baby cows and it's definitely not infallible, the recent melamine issues with it in China has proved that. Things may not have been proved one way or the other as to whether formula has definite risks associated with it but breastfeeding most certainly has benefits, however small they may seem individually they can add up to a fair amount.

Ok, I'm getting a bit repetitive now lol, time for me to take a breather.

As I've said before, to me it only matters that the child is adequately fed and is loved, not the method of feeding.

Defensiveness and Breastmilk

I came across a rather interesting conversation on a friends Facebook wall about Breast Milk donation and Milk Banks and how people feel about them. There was the usual happy conversation about how some would have been happy to donate or make use of donated milk, screening for drugs and illnesses was also briefly touched upon, and there were a few women who quite openly, honestly and plainly stated that they would prefer to use formula over breast milk that was not theirs.

Then there was the one woman who seemed to take every comment FOR breastfeeding and using/donating to milk banks as a personal attack on her and her choices.
She's unlikely to ever read this, I don't even know her myself, have never seen her name before today but I still have to say this.

Honey, it's not about you.

Yeah, that probably sounds really patronising (apologies) but I have to say if she's feeling that defensive about it, especially when there was absolutely NO formula-bashing going on, then she should realise and own her guilty feelings and try to move past them, rather than over-reacting and abusing women who were having a perfectly civil discussion about Milk Banks and Breast Milk donation.

Now, I know absolutely nothing about this person other than she decided to formula feed her child/ren, and from what I could pick up it was because she couldn't breastfeed. I make no judgements about her or her experiences, I don't know if she's had people look down on her or what for formula feeding but as one of the other participants in the conversation said;

"No one can make you feel bad about formula feeding either, you make a choice and if you are happy with your choice then it shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks."

I agree with this fully.

-------------------------------------------------

Now, I'm going to leave the above as it is and talk about how I personally feel about breastfeeding, formula and milk-banks.

I'm planning on breastfeeding. For as long as I can, preferably 18 months but if bubs decides to wean prior to that then I can hardly force feed him now can I.

As for the whole Breastfeeding vs. Formula Feeding debate (which I think is ridiculous to be honest) yes I fully support breastfeeding and I DO think it's best, I also fully agree that for those who either cannot breastfeed for some reason or choose not to, formula is there for them to use. To add another dimension, I also think that a milk bank would be a very good idea for those who cant/choose not to breastfeed but still want their child/ren to have breast milk. Why should it be all or nothing?

I would gladly donate to a milk bank, I even thought about it after I lost my son Antony and had furiously leaking boobs, I just didn't know how to go about it and I wasn't in the right frame of mind to try to figure it out at the time. Once this one is born I would be quite happy to donate any excess.

I would not force parents to make use of donated milk if it didn't sit right with them for any reason. I get that some people feel squeamish about another persons milk being used to feed THEIR child. I get that some people think that the entire idea is silly and that that's why we have formula. I get that some people will worry about the screening any milk would have to undergo, and about any possible allergens from the donaters diet. Simply put, I get that it's not for everyone but shouldn't it be a viable option for those who would like to make use of it?

Pretty much to me it boils down to I don't care which method you choose to use to feed your child, whether it be breast, bottle or whatever, as long as the child is fed adequately and loved, that's all that really matters.

Don't beat yourself up about it!

(I apologise for the rambliness, it's 3am and I just HAD to write something about this)